Answers to Lou’s question June 8, 2008

My brother in law, Lou, asked me what I do on an average Friday night.  In true Lou fashion it was an excellent question.  I don’t do much when I’m not at work.  So my dear Lou to answer your question I:

1. Clean. There is however so much cleaning I can do. I live in a one bedroom condo. 

2. Play with one of the cats as the other one doesn’t care for me much. I got Chica to keep Kitty Jones company.  Too bad for me, Chica doesn’t like me.  Too bad for Chica, Kitty Jones hates her.  They fight constantly. What was supposed to be a story book relationship of two cats frolicking through the house is actually an hourly brawl. I think Kitty Jones resents me for bringing home another animal. I just can’t win.

3. Listen to music.  Right now I’m listening to the Beach boys. Earlier… Christmas music. God only knows and Carol of the Bells, thank God for the Ipod Shuffle.

4. Watch way too much TV. There are my first tier favorite shows like King of the Hill. Then there are my second tier favorite shows like the trashy goodness that is reality dating shows.  You know the ones, Rock of Love, The Bachelor, Flavor of Love, and my new favorite Farmer wants a Wife.  Then there is “make-you-feel-better” TV like Maury which I watch when I think my life sucks.  Then I end up with hurt feelings when a girl who brings on 5 guys for a paternity test has an understanding and supportive fiancee.  I shake my head in disgust.  SHE’S ENGAGED!?!?!?! Damn… my life really does suck.

5. Stare at my phone wondering why no one loves me and willing it to ring. If it does it’s usually Shaunica.  I love her so.  The only downside of her calling me is that after twenty or so minutes of lovely conversation she tells me a horrible “Marine story” that leave me with a dropped jaw.  I have limited her to one story per call.  I can’t handle more than that.

6. Talk to my sisters. With your wife we exchange witty banter, call each other idiots, press the keypad on the phone to annoy each other, she lectures me on whatever problem I’m having, she berates me for not interjecting at the appropriate times with “mmm. , really? , you don’t say. , shut yo mouth!”, we talk about Hell’s Kitchen then tell each other we are spent and hang up. With Liza I sit there and listen to her fabulous stories, she encourages me, then she usually has to go to do something awesome.  After I hang up I usually throw up.  I have a condition called I-hate-my-life-itis that causes me to vomit when I come in contact with someone who seems to have a perfect life. In case you are not hip on my sense of humor the last two statements were meant to be a joke. GOD! I’M SO MISUNDERSTOOD!

7. Cook. Usually in the buff but since burning my chest while cooking bacon have since used a bib apron. If I’m not cooking I’m reading a cookbook to get my next meal idea. I’ve been known to mutter the phrase “giggity goo” while reading.

8.  Make crafts. I made a journal last week.  Before that picture frames. I am expecting my friend Shawna and her daughter Shelby soon so we can turn an old cocoa powder tin into a waste basket.  I have one in my bedroom that she thought was cute so I’m gonna help her make one for her room.

9. Make plans I don’t follow through with maybe I’ll go to the pool today, maybe I’ll work out today, maybe I’ll blog today, Maybe I’ll finish one of the five books I’ve started, Maybe I’ll… you get the picture.

10. Wait for the weekly phone call from my parents.  With my Dad it’s a short and sweet two min call.  He gets out what he wants to say, he asks me if I’m ok, then gets off the phone.  You never know how long the call with my mom will last. She usually has a lot to say which is good because I am usually in the mood to listen a lot. 

So anyway that’s what I do on the norm.  I used to go to midnight sushi but then the manager was rude to me and tried to force me to eat bad squid so I haven’t been back.  I planned on posting a picture of my cats fighting but I can’t figure out how to do it. Shoot!